[ooc] first impression/question meme

[hawkwardmoment]

I THINK THIS IS LIKE... THE FIRST TIME I GOT 1000 COMMENTS IN LESS THAN A YEAR. So to celebrate:

ASK A QUESTION it can be anything CFUD related, OOC, IC, First Impressions, Relationship, psychology, thoughts, whatever. I.E. My character's opinion of your character or maybe what you have been wondering about this behavior or that, or general thoughts on my characters or canons or what, who I might consider topping you into apping, etc.

When I reply I will also ask you a question in turn!

My characters aside from Hawke are Chroche, Yurippe, Jin Kisaragi, and Theodore.

Comments

[fistingthing]

I SEE YOUR TL;DR AND RAISE BY REALLY TL;DR.

How Fenris feels about Hawke really isn't as complicated as it seems sometimes. It went through some complicated stages: at first, the only things keeping him from running the hell away were his feeling that he owed Hawke for her assistance and the possibility that she might be able to help him take out Danarius, when Danarius came back for him.

He never expected Danarius to take six years to come back, or he might have run anyways. As it is, he stayed, fought beside Hawke, and learned more about her. Her initial flirting frightened him as much as it intrigued him. Hawke was a mage, and one he didn't have a sense of yet; for all he knew, she was already planning how to get her own collar around his pretty elven neck. She was also a very beautiful woman, however, and had helped him, and he couldn't help the fact that he was attracted to her, so he flirted back, cautiously. And kind of badly, but on the other hand, it's not like he had any practice, so he didn't really do too badly, considering . . . XD

And then as he was waiting for Danarius to come back, Hawke kept dragging him along on quest after quest, and he watched her, the entire time. Her idealism made him angry, but he respected her for having firm beliefs even if he didn't agree with them. He began to understand that he could trust her, at least to an extent. When she was in the Deep Roads, he was bored. He was lonely. He hadn't even realized he could be lonely; in the previous three years, he'd never particularly missed anyone. He was a little stung that she chose Anders to take instead of him, but had to admit that a Grey Warden - even if he was an abomination - was a more logical choice than him, when you're expecting to meet Darkspawn. But it still stung, and he missed her, and both of those things surprised him. He realized that he wanted her to rely on him, and that he liked being around her even though she was a mage. It was a scary realization.

When she returned, and attained wealth and the reclaiming of her noble heritage, it made Fenris nervous. Mages with wealth and power are magisters. He worried that it would change her, that gaining material power would corrupt her as simply having magic hadn't managed. But over the next three years . . . nothing changed. Hawke remained the same. And she continued to express interest in him, and he- he only grew more and more attracted to her, more in love. Because he was. He didn't really recognize it as such, he'd never experienced it before! But he was definitely in love.

And Hawke didn't do anything to break his growing respect and trust. Angry as he was after the Fade, she refused to deal with the Sloth demon, which . . . he was not expecting. Mages make deals with demons, given the opportunity . . . right? But she didn't. And then he went and fell for Wryme's promise of power to equal the magisters and afterwards, he was almost choking to death on his shame. Which is why he took it out on her! He couldn't handle it, and so he focused on his anger at her softness towards her fellow mages. Sry Hawke.

Then Hadriana happened, and Hawke's immediate willingness to help him really touched him. Helping Orana, giving her a job - he jumped to the slave conclusion and felt like a total dick when Hawke corrected him, because this was Hawke and she was helping him and - if such a thing could even truly exist - a good mage, and he insulted her by assuming the worst. Then killing Hadriana, etc, etc, snaps at her again and takes off.

But he can't get her out of his mind, and he feels guilty over his actions when she was just trying to help him, so he goes to apologize, and of course it ends up in an argument which just made things worse since that wasn't what he wanted at all and- and - oh, wow, how did we end up in this bed together?